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  #11  
Old 07-08-2008, 03:17 AM
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Rafeal Rafeal is offline
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Well aware of that fact Ashen. About the whole floaating location thing I mean. I wouldn't go so far as to call myself a King, even though I've been RPing for like... 8 years? Lol, sad, isn't it?

But, yes, thanks for the good comments. I'll work much harder on a plot for this guy to go through and make a story instead of a random butchery of some random bandit.
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Rafealhttp://www.dragontavern.com/champions/rafeal/
Xypherhttp://www.dragontavern.com/champions/xypher/
Ceriahttp://www.dragontavern.com/champions/ceria/

'We're the regulators that deregulate
We're the animators that deanimate
We're the propagators of all genocide
Burning through the world's resources, then we turn and hide'


- (\__/)
- (='.'=)==l--
- (")_(")

SWORDED!

Helping Ashen's plot to destroy those damned bunnies and their plot to take the world over.
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  #12  
Old 07-08-2008, 03:27 AM
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Ashen Ashen is offline
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Awesome, I can't wait to see it.
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  #13  
Old 07-08-2008, 04:07 AM
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Psychotic character +10 review points from Belkaim Also like it but you could add a plot too either way it's good to me
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Belkaim Grudgefist a one man wrecking ball of dwarven beer muscle, they get sensiti-*cough* angry when you say fat.
Corrig some are born with greatness others have it thrust upon him also others sort of decompose after a century or three.
Kippil Ebonstrings When most people ask for catgut you assume they're a musician, Kippil on the otherhand he's a very special kind of physician.
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  #14  
Old 07-08-2008, 08:38 PM
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Rafeal Rafeal is offline
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Well, here's the next one, hope to make this last a few parts or more. Hope its good, leave comments please. Hope the plot is not too hard to follow.

~~~~~~~~~
Part1
~~~~~~~~~

Rafeal groaned slightly as his minions finally managed to break through the door of the tower. He rubbed his temples, his violet eyes filled mild annoyance at his undead minions. "I realize you idiots are dead, but could you be a little quieter when you break through something? I'd rather not find out there's a dragon or something suitably unfriendly, and hungry, in there." He grumbled, wincing at the jagged shards that made the archway unsymmetrical.

He stepped into the tower, raising his eyebrows in surprise. "Its... clean?" He said, running his finger along a pile of stones, drawing a miniscule amount of dust up. "That is never a good sign... This is supposed to be abandoned..." He muttered, looking up, shaking his head at the jagged chunks of stairs lining the inside of the tower. "Bah, up is impossible." He said, stationing a several his skeletal warriors to patrol the entrance, implanting a spell that would tell him if they saw or heard anything.

He motioned towards a fallen piller, his skeletal troops surrounding it, the necromantic magic embuing them with life proving its power as they lifted the pillar and moved it across the room, a trap door revealed. "Well well." He said, admiring the perfect symmetry of the brass ring on the door. "Open it." He said, motioning his minions towards the door, watching them heave it open. "Better be something worth it down here..." He grumbled, tired of barely having enough gold at the end of his daily trips to pay for his wound treatment. He started down the stairs after making several more skeletal warriors partrol around the room, not liking surprises.

He sighed as he finally reached the bottom of the stairs, panting slightly. "Next time, you guys can carry me down a set of stairs..." He grumbled at his skeletons, looking at them for a moment before bellowing in anger. "You ignorant fool! The left horn on your helmet is a quarter-inch longer than the right one!" He yelled at the undead minion, apparently ignoring the fact that the skeleton didn't care. Rafeal sighed, collecting himself as he turned on his heel, looking at a ornate door. "Well... Must be something good on the other side..." He said, motioning two of his skeletons towards the door, and watching them touch it.

Rafeal blinked as they burst into golden flames, melting into puddles of spent necromantic energy and goo. "Well, that was unexpected..." He said, looking around the door, seeing the wards that time. "Ah... Must be something good then, but these are some pretty terribly constructed wards..." He muttered to himself, counter-acting the wards with his own magic, directing his minions to open the door, a blast of mildly stale air rushing past him as they opened the door.

He stepped through the door, disbelief on his face as he looked at the middle of the room, a small child sleeping in a chair. "All this... for a kid?" He asked, not seeing a single piece of gold or even a chip of a gem that would be worth some gold. He sighed, on the verge of tears as he walked toward the child. "Might as well see if this kid's even alive..." He muttered, scratching his head as he looked at the child, a girl, looking for a sign the she was alive.

He sighed. "You alive?" He asked before looking up, an image of a fireball filling the eyes of his skeletal warriors before they were annihilated. "Damn..." He said, looking back as the child mumbled and stretched. "Well, leave her to be a snack or whatever for the fireball flinger upstairs, or take her, be a hero, and hope I don't get blown to bits?" He asked himself, hearing a second explosion at the entrance of the stairs, signalling that the guards he had left there were obliterated now. "I must be feeling especially insane today..." He grumbled, picking the girl up with one arm, gathering necromantic energy in his left hand as his minions charged up the stairs ahead of him. He watched as they were annihilated in a few moments.

'This is nuts!' Rafeal thought to himself, watching the rather angry mage step forward, the mage not letting spell designed to cause pain fly for some reason. Rafeal shrugged mentally, flinging his own spell, the mage caught off guard and wrapped in a web of necromantic energy, rolling down the stairs, making comical sounds of agony as Rafeal ran up the stairs. "He's not gonna take long to get out of there, and he definitely isn't gonna be happy about it either." Rafeal said as he dashed out of the stairs, setting the girl down as he heard a small explosion at the bottom of the stairs, panting heavily.

'Think! Think, damn you! The pillar!' Rafeal looked at the piller, hurriedly summoning some skeletons that immediately picked it up and dropped it over the stairs, the skeletons crumbling away. Rafeal snatched up the child, running out of the tower and a gully, finding a shallow cave and diving into it, holding the child carefully, his breath coming in short, sharp gasps for few tense moments.

He finnally got himself under control, wiping the sweat on his brow off as he looked at the girl, who had woken up. He rubbed his temple a bit, the girl yawning a bit before he saw the mage mark that designated her as a sacrifice. "Oh... Why me?!" Rafeal moaned, leaning back against the wall of the swallow cave. "No gold, no food, and now I've got some really powerful, really pissed off, mage's sacrifice? Why me?" He complained, glaring at the unsymmetrical entrance of the cave.

Rafeal looked at the girl then. "Well, whats your name? Mine is Rafeal." He said, his legs shaking slightly as the fear of almost being blown up began to catch up to him.

"I'm Mira." She said, smiling at him.

"Well, I'll take you to a warmer place after I've rested a bit." He said, mildly disturbed by how easily this child trusted him. 'It should be obvious I'm a Necromancer... She's not worried that I'll turn her into some sorta undead pet or something?' He thought to himself. "You're not scared of me, even though I'm a Necromancer?" He asked, unable to stop his question from escaping.

"No, since that man back there was gonna try and summon a demon by killing me. I think you raising the dead is lots safer." She said, grinning at Rafeal before hugging herself to him.

"Oi, oi! I'm not your pi-... Crap." Rafeal said, sighing as he realized the girl was alseep, looking out of the cave. 'Fate... I truly, with a perfectly round and symmetrical sphere of hatred, hate you...' He grumbled mentally, dozing off slightly, making plans on how he'd get himself and this kid to the Dragon Tavern in one piece and unbarbequed as well...

~~~~~~~~
End Part1
~~~~~~~~
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Rafealhttp://www.dragontavern.com/champions/rafeal/
Xypherhttp://www.dragontavern.com/champions/xypher/
Ceriahttp://www.dragontavern.com/champions/ceria/

'We're the regulators that deregulate
We're the animators that deanimate
We're the propagators of all genocide
Burning through the world's resources, then we turn and hide'


- (\__/)
- (='.'=)==l--
- (")_(")

SWORDED!

Helping Ashen's plot to destroy those damned bunnies and their plot to take the world over.
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  #15  
Old 07-08-2008, 10:12 PM
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Ryuu-san Ryuu-san is offline
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Haha! Man, I gotta say, this one's a funny story. I think I might laugh my head off if you keep it up. As I said before, wonderfully written, great style, and pwnsomeful characters.
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Ryoku Level 6 Warmaster

"This is a sworded bunny. For every sworded bunny in the world, one regular bunny is defeated. If we get enough sworded bunnies on the internet, we can stop bunnies insidious plot for world domination."

- (\__/)
- (='.'=)==l--
- (")_(")

SWORDED!

Helping Ashen's plot to destroy those damned bunnies and their plot to take the world over.
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  #16  
Old 07-08-2008, 10:32 PM
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Ashen Ashen is offline
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Plot! Honest to god plot! It looks like a good one, too. I'd like to see Rafeal as the reluctant protector of Mira for a long, long time. It's entertaining. Good job, Rafeal!
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  #17  
Old 07-08-2008, 10:47 PM
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Ryuu-san Ryuu-san is offline
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Wink

Really, Ashen's right. (Not trying to sound sarcastic. x.x) I like the plot idea.
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Kaen Level 9 Infiltrator
Karyuu Level 9 Sky Guard
Lucien Level 8 Cavalier
Ryoku Level 6 Warmaster

"This is a sworded bunny. For every sworded bunny in the world, one regular bunny is defeated. If we get enough sworded bunnies on the internet, we can stop bunnies insidious plot for world domination."

- (\__/)
- (='.'=)==l--
- (")_(")

SWORDED!

Helping Ashen's plot to destroy those damned bunnies and their plot to take the world over.

Last edited by Ryuu-san; 07-08-2008 at 10:58 PM.
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  #18  
Old 07-08-2008, 10:49 PM
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Rafeal Rafeal is offline
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Heh, thanks. I will keep it up, long as my muse keeps being creative. Might do some sketches of Rafeal and Mira. Not sure yet.

The next part'll be up soon I hope. In a week, I'll have limited access to the net, going to visit my older sister. She plays WoW, therefore I'll be limited on when I can get on the comp lol. Just figured I'd give you guys a heads up.
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Rafealhttp://www.dragontavern.com/champions/rafeal/
Xypherhttp://www.dragontavern.com/champions/xypher/
Ceriahttp://www.dragontavern.com/champions/ceria/

'We're the regulators that deregulate
We're the animators that deanimate
We're the propagators of all genocide
Burning through the world's resources, then we turn and hide'


- (\__/)
- (='.'=)==l--
- (")_(")

SWORDED!

Helping Ashen's plot to destroy those damned bunnies and their plot to take the world over.
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  #19  
Old 07-08-2008, 11:56 PM
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Ashen Ashen is offline
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You're going to be prevented from producing art so your sister can play a video game? There's got to be at least one religion that considers that a mortal sin.
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  #20  
Old 07-09-2008, 12:00 AM
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Belkaim Belkaim is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ashen View Post
You're going to be prevented from producing art so your sister can play a video game? There's got to be at least one religion that considers that a mortal sin.
And if not can always create one *nods*
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Belkaim Grudgefist a one man wrecking ball of dwarven beer muscle, they get sensiti-*cough* angry when you say fat.
Corrig some are born with greatness others have it thrust upon him also others sort of decompose after a century or three.
Kippil Ebonstrings When most people ask for catgut you assume they're a musician, Kippil on the otherhand he's a very special kind of physician.
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